This archive report was first published on 13 May 2020.
On May 13, 2020, Lillian Muli shared a powerful message with women who have been through abusive relationships, encouraging them to stay strong and not give up.
She invited women to share their experiences, and many responded with their stories of emotional and mental abuse.
One woman wrote, 'Yes me too and I suffered in silence...not even my mother knew about it...I was even abused at 8 months pregnant and I was almost losing my baby but I thank God I am not in that space again and am moved on to someone better...I really have gone through a lot in my 1st marriage...a lot of beatings only God knows the pain I went through.'
Another woman shared her experience, 'Yes. Loving the wrong person who made me feel so worthless to a point I even had self-esteem issues.'
Lillian Muli, a mother of two, offered words of wisdom to women who have been through similar experiences, advising them not to limit themselves to dating a certain type of men.
She wrote, '...after going through the same pain twice in my life I realized I was attracting the same character in my relationships because I was attracted to a certain type. You must put an end to attracting certain type. Take time to heal and then really take time before you open to someone else.'
She also cautioned women against sharing too many intimate details about their past abuse, warning that it could be used against them by their new partners.
As someone who has experienced abuse herself, Lillian Muli knows firsthand the pain that never goes away. However, she believes that it can be replaced by wisdom and a deep love for oneself.
She wrote, 'I wish you well. The pain never really goes away but it can be replaced by the wisdom to be extremely in love with yourself. Loving yourself means burying the ghosts of the past and living in a present where you know that your mental health must be safeguarded at all costs.'
