This archive report was first published on 20 April 2020.
At 40, Tom thought he had it all together - a good education, a stable job, and a physically fit body. However, he harbors a secret that has left him feeling lonely and unfulfilled: a lifelong habit of masturbation.
Tom's journey began at 16, when he started masturbating daily. Despite his best efforts, he couldn't shake off the habit, even as he entered adulthood. The problem worsened when he tried to have sex with women, only to find himself unable to maintain an erection.
Desperate for help, Tom turned to the Nyakundi Report community, seeking advice from readers and experts on how to overcome his addiction and find meaningful relationships.
One reader, Kevin Moen, suggested that Tom seek spiritual and medical intervention to break the bondage of his habit. Another reader, Ouma Raguma-Sifuyo, recommended counseling to help Tom overcome his self-esteem issues and develop a positive view of himself.
Robert Ongeri, a reader and sex therapist, advised Tom to stop masturbating, citing its negative effects on his emotional well-being. Onyango Outha, another reader, suggested that Tom seek medical attention to address any underlying issues that may be contributing to his habit.
Boke Mahare, a counselor with a background in psychology, offered a more nuanced perspective, suggesting that Tom revisit his childhood and identify the root cause of his low self-esteem. She emphasized the importance of seeking help from a professional counselor and enlisting the support of loved ones.
Simon Anyona, a relationships counselor, provided a detailed explanation of the challenges Tom faces, noting that masturbation can become a deeply ingrained habit that is difficult to break. He recommended that Tom seek professional help to overcome his addiction and develop a healthy relationship with sex.
