This archive report was first published on 18 December 2019.
December 18, 2019
As a parent, it's natural to want to protect your child from the harsh realities of life. But lying to them may not be the best solution, as it can have devastating effects on their emotional and psychological well-being.
Beatrice Cheptoo, a single mother, admits to lying to her daughter Miriam about her father. She told Miriam that the father of her second-born child was also her father, fearing that the truth would be too painful for her child. However, Miriam's curiosity eventually led her to discover the truth, and Beatrice was forced to confront the consequences of her actions.
Research conducted by Nanyang Technological University in Singapore suggests that parents' lies can be harmful to their children later in adulthood. Children who are frequently lied to experience guilt and shame, are more likely to lie to their parents, and are more likely to be selfish and manipulative.
But what about 'little white lies'? Are they as bad as ones with deeper consequences? According to the research, parents mostly lied about money, to put an end to a child's misconduct, and to get them to do something such as eating. As adults, children who were lied to by their parents exaggerate about events, lie to help others, and lie about themselves.
Some parents, like Eunice Akoth, believe that small lies are harmless and won't cause harm to their children. However, others, like Dolphin Achieng, prefer to tell the truth, even if it's difficult, to avoid creating mistrust in their children.
Ken Aringo, a pastor and relationship therapist, advises parents to always tell the truth, even if it's uncomfortable. He believes that lying can create a cycle of dishonesty that can be difficult to break.
Wellington Edaki, a 25-year-old lawyer, grew up in a transparent home where his parents always told him the truth. He believes that this has helped him develop a strong sense of honesty and integrity.
