This archive report was first published on 4 December 2019.
Should You Continue with a Relationship Where Your Partner Has a Baby with Another Woman? ¶
Sheila, a woman who shared her story with us, is in a dilemma. She has been in a relationship with a man she grew up with, but things took a turn when he got another woman pregnant. Despite this, he wants to 'fix things' with Sheila, leaving her wondering if she should continue with the relationship.
Sheila's boyfriend has a lot of pride and often brags about going abroad. He also has a tendency to ignore her, but claims to love her. When Sheila goes quiet, he becomes insecure and accuses her of being with another man. This behavior has left Sheila feeling betrayed and unsure about the future of their relationship.
One of the readers, Tasma Saka, advised Sheila to 'gather herself and get moving.' According to Tasma, Sheila's boyfriend has no time for her and is only keeping her for his own benefit. Tasma also suggested that Sheila and her boyfriend should go for HIV tests before reuniting and consider legalizing their marriage if they decide to get back together.
Onyango Outha, another reader, suggested that Sheila and her boyfriend should consider counseling to live in harmony. However, Onyango also warned Sheila to be cautious of her boyfriend's careless behavior and prioritize her own well-being.
Ouma Ragumo – Sifuyo, a reader who identified as a woman, advised Sheila to think outside the box and consider whether the relationship is geared towards marriage or just a way to pass time. According to Ouma, if the relationship has no well-defined possible outcomes, Sheila should be thinking about moving on.
Boke, a counselor, suggested that Sheila's boyfriend has become contemptuous and takes her for granted. Boke advised Sheila to be decisive and judge for herself if she can put up with her boyfriend's behavior. However, Boke also discouraged Sheila from continuing the relationship due to her boyfriend's infidelity.
Simon Anyona, a relationships counselor, suggested that Sheila's boyfriend may be harboring contempt for her and may never take her seriously. According to Simon, Sheila's boyfriend has no feelings for her and only wants to keep her wrapped around his finger. Simon also advised Sheila to look at things from a realistic perspective and consider the fact that her boyfriend has a baby with another woman.
Published on December 4, 2019
