This archive report was first published on 15 November 2019.
It's been 16 years since my father passed away, but the lessons he taught me remain etched in my memory. One of the most significant lessons he imparted was that 'real men don't cry.'
My father, Mr. Bonnie Ontita, was a tough man who had been a medal-winning boxer in his youth. He was known for his abrasive personality and was not afraid to use his belt to discipline us when we misbehaved.
However, it was not just his physical toughness that made him a great father. He also taught me the importance of being strong and resilient in the face of adversity. He believed that men should not show emotions, especially in front of their children.
One incident that stands out in my mind was when I was in Standard Three and a bully named Ray beat me up. I went home crying, but my father was not sympathetic. He belted me for not fighting back and then gave me a small spanner to use on Ray the next time he saw him.
While I was initially hesitant to follow my father's advice, I eventually used the spanner to defend myself against Ray. However, I got into trouble at school for attempting to 'implicate' my father in my actions.
Despite the challenges I faced, my father's lessons have stayed with me to this day. I believe that men should maintain a stiff upper lip and not show emotions, especially in front of their children. This is not to say that men should be emotionless, but rather that they should be strong and resilient in the face of adversity.
As I look back on my life, I realize that my father's lessons have served me well. I have faced many challenges, but I have always tried to maintain a strong and resilient attitude. And while I may have cried on a few occasions, it was always in private and not in front of my children.
Today, I see many men who are encouraged to cry and 'let it all out.' They are told that bottling up emotions is harmful to their health, but I disagree. I believe that men should maintain a stiff upper lip and not show emotions, especially in front of their children.
As I reflect on my father's lessons, I am reminded of the importance of being strong and resilient in the face of adversity. I hope that my children will learn from my father's lessons and grow up to be strong and resilient men who can face any challenge that comes their way.
