This archive report was first published on 28 October 2019.
It's a harsh reality that many women face: being judged and treated differently by their in-laws based on their financial status. The societal pressure to be well-off is overwhelming, especially for unmarried women over 30 and those in relationships.
Being a mother or wife is not enough; women are expected to go the extra mile when visiting their in-laws, and those who can't afford to do so are often met with disdain. The humiliation of being treated as inferior because of one's financial situation is a painful experience that many women endure.
Research has shown that 'well-monied' wives receive special treatment at their in-laws' homes. The more money they have, the more respect they receive. These women are often treated like royalty, with their every need catered to. In contrast, women who are jobless and broke are expected to be at everyone's beck and call, with their days planned out from the moment their husbands call to say they'll be visiting.
The disparity in treatment is staggering. While 'well-monied' wives sleep in and start calling shots, 'broke' women are directed to the farm to harvest bananas for breakfast. If the 'loaded' wives complain of a headache, the home comes to a standstill, and every effort is made to attend to their needs. In contrast, 'broke' women are often left to find their own cures for headaches.
During family functions, the rich wife gets to eat first, and her preferences are catered to. On the day of departure, the in-laws will go to great lengths to ensure she is treated with dignity, while 'broke' women are often left to fend for themselves.
It's a sad reality that many women face, and it's a reminder that societal expectations can be cruel. As the author so aptly puts it, 'you have a special place in hell' for watching as your women go through this in your mother's home.
