This archive report was first published on 8 October 2019.
On a Saturday afternoon, I found myself reclined on the sofa, sipping an undisclosed beverage, lost in thought. The sentiments of a panellist at the 17th session of the UN General Assembly had left me pondering global matters, including the protection of extra-terrestrial organisms.
My reverie was broken by a knock on the door. I was greeted by Faith, a Mobile Laundry and Hygiene Executive, who introduced herself as 'Mama Safi'. She presented her resume, highlighting her meticulous washing of clothes, cleaning the house, and scrubbing utensils until they shone.
She claimed to make the best culinary wonders from all corners of the country, specialising in rice and cabbage stew. However, upon further prodding, she confessed that she had obtained my contacts and prospective customer needs from a social media forum I had posted the previous night.
I was impressed by her business acumen, but also concerned about the situation. I had indicated that I was home alone and feeling tired of performing household chores, and it seemed that Faith had caught wind of this.
She must have concluded that I was alone on the 8th floor with a mountain of dirty laundry, heaps of garbage in the kitchen, and a murky bathroom. As I stood at the doorway, interviewing her for the task at hand, I was aware that Mama Kui of the 7th floor was watching the proceedings from her window, waiting for me to welcome this guest into the house.
However, I maintained my composure and kept a professional look on my face. Due to good parenting from Wa Hellen and strict Catholic upbringing, I avoided direct eye contact with the laundry lady and fixed my gaze towards the skies.
When I politely declined her services, citing that water had been disconnected and I only had two dirty shirts that needed cleaning, Faith took the feedback positively and left me with her contacts in case I needed her services in the future.
She sauntered away whistling a jolly song, and minutes later, she was knocking at Baba Ryan's door. He was also on solitary home confinement, and I doubted whether he could stand the impending challenge as meticulously as I had just done.
