This archive report was first published on 14 September 2019.
Published on September 14, 2019, a resolution was passed by the Kenyan Christian community to protect churches from political interference.
Following an incident where two boxers masquerading as Kenyan MPs disrupted a holy mass in Murang'a, the community decided to take a stand.
They proposed that any church intending to host an MP should forward a written request to the Speaker of the National Assembly one year in advance.
The letter should be accompanied by relevant documents, including a recommendation from the area chief, cattle dip chairman, and market sweeper.
The chief would need to justify that the presence of the politician in the area would not be a threat to world peace.
Politicians are prone to travelling with private armouries, and Christians would rather turn their village fields into crop farming than into a shooting range.
The cattle dip chairman should provide reassurance that the politician's entourage would not bring human-cattle conflict in the village.
The sweeper would write a recommendation letter promising that the market would not be littered with campaign materials that are not environment-friendly.
Furthermore, the community acknowledged that MPs sacrifice their quality time searching for Christ every Sunday when they should be at home watching paint dry.
They recognised that their failure to provide MPs with cooling conditions inside churches has led to the rise in their body temperatures.
The community has since gone around the country popularising the Punguza Makofi referendum Bill and plans to relocate Christ from churches to Parliament Buildings.
A Paybill number will be opened for all Christians to send in their donations for the construction of an ultramodern cathedral inside Parliament Buildings.
Any MP found loitering in other churches will be arrested and charged with walking in a manner likely to cause trouble.
A six-month media gag order shall be the corresponding fine, or a one-year suspension of their VIP pass at the airport lounge.
