This archive report was first published on 30 August 2019.
For many first-time mothers, the arrival of their newborn is a life-changing experience. The overwhelming desire to keep their baby safe can lead to an overprotective behavior known as 'Precious Firstborn Syndrome' (PFS). This condition, where mothers become excessively cautious and obsessive about their child's well-being, can have a significant impact on their lives and the lives of their children.
According to psychologist James Mbugua, PFS is a common phenomenon among first-time mothers. He attributes this behavior to the lack of preparation and training that new mothers receive, as well as the high expectations placed on them by society.
'Young mothers lack preparation so they don’t know if they are doing it right and yet the training they get from antenatal clinics is not enough,' says Mbugua. 'Inexperienced couples become extra aware and concerned for the child. A firstborn child carries the dreams and aspirations of the parents; what the father and mother think their child should be.'
For mothers like Milly Chebby, a TV producer and vlogger, PFS is a reality they can relate to. Chebby says that when her baby was born, she was the only one who attended to her for the first three months. 'I am a paranoid mother and I know it, very few people have carried my child. I only trust my husband and a few family members,' she says.
Chebby's experience is not unique. Many mothers have shared their stories of how PFS has affected their lives and the lives of their children. Yvonne Odhiambo, a fashion designer, says that she spent a lot of money buying clothes and items for her baby, only to find out that they were not needed. 'I bought excess things that I did not need. I bought newborn clothes for my son and some of them he has never worn; he could not fit on the small ones,' she says.
Yvonne Darcq, a popular singer, also shares her experience of how PFS affected her life. 'As a first-time mother, there are many things you need to figure out for yourself like being a mother, understanding the child and breastfeeding among other things,' she says. 'For my first child, I remember buying expensive products to clean her feeding bottles. However, when the baby started reacting to some of these products, I went the old school way to sanitize with boiled salty water.'
Psychologist Mbugua warns that too much protection has a downside to it, noting that children who are overprotected in childhood will face identity issues in adulthood. 'Too much attention to a child will make it hard for the child to deal with the larger society and his surroundings without the parent. The child will not know how to deal with certain issues or make sound decisions without the parent’s influence,' he says.
