This archive report was first published on 29 July 2019.
On May 23, 2017, Dan Kinyanjui's life changed forever when his wife passed away just hours after delivering their second child. Two years later, he has moved on and is now in a relationship with a new woman, sparking a heated debate on how soon is too soon to move on after losing a spouse.
Mr. Kinyanjui, a popular figure in Mombasa, took to Instagram to announce his new relationship, captioning a photo of him and the woman in a car, 'Wednesdays are made of this!' and 'Ua na jabali lake (A flower and its bedrock)'. However, his fans were quick to respond, with one commentator saying, 'I think you have moved on so fast. I miss your wife.'
The debate has been ongoing for a while, with marriage counsellors weighing in on the issue. Bishop Philip Kitoto of the Kenya Assemblies of God said, 'Life must go on. You cannot just sit and watch life go by. Yes, you might feel as if a part of you is gone, but you have a thousand other reasons to live for.'
Rev. Kitoto also advised individuals to take time to heal first and not rush into remarriage. Mrs. Bertha Mwangi, a widow and national chairperson of the Muungano wa Wajane Organisation, also urged widows not to rush, saying, 'You can't start looking for a person to come and relieve you of your (financial) problems. You need a person who will be your companion in friendship.'
Mr. Kinyanjui responded to the commentator, saying, 'Matters grieving are different and unique to every individual. I loved Dru dearly and it has been over two years now. If the time is short for you, then maybe when you go through a similar ordeal, you can chart your own path.'
The issue is not limited to Kenya, as comedian-cum-actor Patton Oswalt was also a subject of the same discussion in 2017. His wife died in April 2016, and in July the following year, he proposed to actress Meredith Salenger.
