This archive report was first published on 15 July 2019.
As the world grapples with rising divorce rates, Chef Ali Mandhry and his wife Khadija Abdalla are bucking the trend with their arranged marriage, a tradition common in their community in Mombasa. The couple, who tied the knot in 2014, shares their experience with Nyakundi Report.
Ali, 31, and Khadija, 23, met for the first time on their wedding night, six months after their engagement. The couple's journey began when Ali's mother approached Khadija's family with a proposal, which they accepted after seeking Khadija's consent.
Ali, who grew up seeing arranged marriages work for his relatives and friends, was drawn to the idea of getting to know and love his spouse with every passing day. 'I wanted to do it the traditional way all through,' he says. 'The first time we met, very briefly, was when my family went to settle bride price. She was all covered up with a hijab and buibui and was very shy. We didn’t even exchange any words.'
Khadija, who was nervous when they first met, says she was impressed by Ali's ambition and success. 'He was tall, handsome, and successful,' she recalls. 'The fact that he was a celebrity didn’t bother me.'
The couple, who now have two daughters, Princess Alyaanah and Princess Anaya, say their arranged marriage has been a success. 'Other than marrying a stranger, I think an arranged marriage is basically like any other marriage,' Khadija says. 'We come from the same background, so that helped a little.'
Ali and Khadija's advice to married couples and those desiring to get married is to always be loving, honest, and have trust in one another. 'Your spouse is only human, so don’t expect them to be angels,' Khadija advises. 'Have realistic expectations, be understanding and forgiving of their flaws, appreciate and praise their positive traits, and be 100% committed to your relationship.'
